As I sit in the cockpit of my airplane, I can feel the alcohol coursing through my veins. I can feel the oncoming in-flight chaos. It’s been a long day of flying and I just want to close my eyes and get some rest. But there’s one problem: my damn monkey.
You see, I have this imaginary monkey who lives in my head and he’s always causing trouble. And tonight, he’s being particularly annoying. Every time I start to drift off into a deep snore, he wakes me up with his incessant chatter because the snoring noise is so loud and is keeping the monkey awake.
“Come on, captain, you can’t fall asleep now!” he chirps in my ear. “We have a plane full of passengers depending on us!”
But I just can’t help the in-flight chaos. The alcohol has made me so drowsy and I just want to get some rest. So I turn to my monkey and give him a piece of my mind.
“Shut up, you stupid monkey!” I slur. “I’m the pilot here and I’ll do what I want. Now let me sleep!”
But my monkey just won’t leave me alone. He’s hopping up and down on my shoulder, pulling on my hair and generally being a nuisance. I can feel my frustration boiling over and I’m about ready to snap.
Finally, I can’t take it anymore. I turn to my monkey and give him a good shake. “Listen here, you little pest. I’m the captain of this plane and I’m not going to let you ruin my rest. Now leave me alone and let me sleep!”
With that, I close my eyes and drift off into a deep snore, my monkey forgotten for the moment. But I know he’ll be back, causing more in-flight chaos as soon as I start to doze off. Such is the life of a drunk pilot with an imaginary monkey.