Pilot Friend: Imagine Your Friend Drunk Pilot

Monkey Friend Monologue

“I can’t believe my pilot friend is at it again, stumbling around and barely able to keep upright. Every time he has a few drinks, he thinks he’s invincible and ends up making a complete fool of himself.

But you know what they say – monkeys always land on their feet. Unfortunately, my pilot friend doesn’t seem to have that same ability. Every time he tries to make his way to the bathroom, he ends up crashing into walls and knocking over furniture.

I’ve tried to intervene and help him, but he just waves me off and insists he’s fine. But he’s not fine – he’s drunk, and he needs to sober up before he hurts himself or someone else.

I know he likes to have a good time, and I’m all for letting loose every now and then. But there’s a limit, and he needs to learn to control himself.

I just hope he realizes that before it’s too late. Until then, I’ll be here to catch him when he falls and make sure he doesn’t do any permanent damage.”

Pilot Friend Monologue

“Ah, that darn monkey of mine! Always worrying about me and my drinking habits. I mean, I’m a grown man and I can take care of myself.

Sure, I may be a bit tipsy right now, but I can still stand up when I need to go to the bathroom. I mean, it’s not like I’m going to fall or anything.

I’ve been drinking for years and I know how to handle myself. I don’t need some imaginary monkey of mine hovering over me, worrying that I can’t do something as simple as stand up and walk to the bathroom.

As a pilot friend of mine once said, with the right balance of caution and confidence, you can keep enjoying your drinks without having to worry about the consequences.

I can handle myself and I don’t need to be coddled like a baby. That’s just the way I am, and I’m sure any other pilot friend of mine would feel the same way.”